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Most surely everyone has been in the situation when you are walking down the street and a stranger girl smiles to you. How can you walk by without coming up to her and setting up a date? After all she is quite pretty. And a new acquaintance is always interesting. And what happens even more often with all users of internet is that they spend several hours in front of the monitor sending short messages – user messages in order to get a new contact. And we wait for answers to those messages in quiver, no matter where we do it – ICQ, chat or an acquaintance internet site! We all desire to meet the person who interested us by an unusual smiley and manner of writing in real life. Plus you can even get his photo. And if you are lucky this photo will truly display the person who have sent it.
Then impressed with his appearance and such an unusual deep inner world you finally make the first step and offer him to meet. An interesting acquaintance and communication in the internet grows into the desire to do the same in the real life. Of course he agrees. Then you both whose acquaintance started in the internet and whose live in the same city set up a convenient place for your first meeting – near the entrance of the park or near the train station ticket office, or near the third birch on the right side of the wide lane that leads to the cinema house. Anyway it’s your choice. The same is with the selection of suitable time.
Then when everything is set up you are sitting, with your heart beating, near the mirror making up. You hope the acquaintance via the internet will lead you to your second half you’ve been looking for all your life. As a true lady you let yourself to be a little late while making up the excuse for it. And finally you see the precious spot and there is a guy standing near it. You come closer and the acquaintance starts from the beginning…
Actually it can be quite different from the communication in the internet. You shouldn’t forget that acquaintance via the internet is always the communication under a mask. It’s always easier to talk with someone who does not see you and may be will never be able to. That’s why acquaintance via the internet happens much easier than in the real life. In real life you can walk silently near the person and still you will be communicating. And surely it is absolutely impossible in the internet.
So, if everything goes fine you will need a way to find out whether your partner wants to continue the acquaintance to become closer to you or not.
The first sign of disappointment is when he dolefully says: “Well, you do not look like your photos in the internet at all.” This phrase can have two meanings. In one way he may be disappointed with the new acquaintance and in the other way he may be surprised because his date looks better than on photos. If he is a true gentleman, he will surely add: “You look much better!”
You should ask your date in what neighborhood he lives. And if he talks about the most distant neighborhood in the city describing all horrible transport problems then this acquaintance via the internet is a true failure. He does not intend to see you off to your home and that means he does not want another hour of your company. But if he says that nothing can scare him and he will walk home without transport then such acquaintance may not be over and the time spent on it in the internet is not lost without any result.
Do not be upset if he has shown up without flowers. Modern young men are not very romantic and they do not have thoughts of brining flowers for their virtual dates. But your target is to encourage him to do it.
Another symptom of disappointment of two people who have met in the internet is sudden silence. And you would never say that this chatterbox could be silent. But here you should also keep in mind that your date may have such wonderful qualities as modesty and timidity. In any case whether your first acquaintance happened in the street or in the internet on your first date the guy must take all initiative. If on the first date he doesn’t know where he wants to go he is either a foreigner or the whole date is completely out of his interest!
It is never interesting to be with a person who doesn’t care of what happens in his life and who is absolutely infirm of purpose. And besides it is another sign of disappointment if he is not interested in sharing his plans with you.
The lively example of indifference on the date after acquaintance via the internet is shown in boredom and apathy to you - a phone call to a friend and interest to his plans for tonight. This conversation may last until you see him off to the bus station and you will only be able to wave him good bye. A person who is interested in you immediately turns his phone off after the first call and apologizes for it. He will desire to stretch your communication time and get to know everything he couldn’t via the internet.
Remember the fact that if you have broken up with your previous partner recently and you want to get over it and begin new relations, you should not mention your feelings about it on the first date. Date is for telling stories from real life. In the internet it is the same as in the real life, you shouldn’t talk about your recent relations unless you were specially asked for.
And of course do not compare your previous partner with the person who is walking by you aloud. All people are unique! And you should never compare two persons by the same parameters! It may look like in the internet you had much more things to talk over but talking about your previous partners is not the best thing to do. And if it happens on your very first date you should think it over again.
If he does not ask for your phone number and just sees you off to the public transport then you can bravely forget about this internet acquaintance! Start looking for a new partner!
But don’t fall in despair! Besides you should be given a medal for it all! Not every person could stand walking for a few hours with shy nihilist and terrible skeptic permanent realist who does not believe in miracles for a moment. Everyone will get over such an acquaintance at least once if the acquaintance happened in the internet.
Girls, don’t forget that though your love for talking is based on physiology (you all have the speech center in your brain that is three times bigger that the one of men’s brain), excessive talkativeness sometimes can drive people mad! You should think what you can share on the first date and what should be left for the next ones.
Another advice for your future internet acquaintances. If you are going on a blind date without seeing a photo of your date try not to imagine any notions of the person who you are going to meet soon. Because the reason of the disappointment of the real meeting is that you have imagined an ideal person in your mind.
We only strive for perfection but we will never be able to reach it. Because you can never meet with it like asymptote never meets the graph of the function. |